I used to have one hell of a bucket list. Actually, my bucket list was it baby!
My bucket list was all I had in life. Everything on that list, mostly travel related, I constantly dreamt of doing of one day soon. Living in France for a while immersing myself in the culture, revisiting Italy to explore everything I missed the first time, hitting places such as Vegas and Disneyland, oh, and Japan… The wanderlust those places would inspire. I was so caught up in my fantasies of faraway places that I was never happy at home.
I pictured myself happily ticking all of those places and more off of my bucket list over a period of years. There were so many things to do, places to see and people to meet. It was just a matter of time and, well, the tiny matter of money. Life would not be complete without having ticked those items off.
I can tell you what wasn’t on the list – settling down, marriage and kids. As an atypical girl, I had no desire to don a wedding dress and walk down the aisle in a ceremony that would bust the bank account, to then be chained to some man for the rest of my life! And kids, well, I don’t think so!
And then I met someone and my whole world changed
Those items on my bucket list, well, they weren’t so important anymore. Okay, perhaps I’m slightly exaggerating. It probably took about five years for the lure of far-off lands to wear off and for my itchy feet to go away, but as I reflect on the concept of a bucket list ten years later and five weeks off of getting hitched I’m actually pleasantly surprised by the thought that I don’t really have a bucket list anymore. Sure, I’d still love to live in France and visit Japan and see Vegas, but if I don’t go then that’s okay. Life won’t be incomplete, it won’t be the end of the world, I won’t die unhappy and regretful, and everything will be okay.
These days I find myself more satisfied living in the now, experiencing things as they happen and just being. I love sitting on the couch, reading and writing, watching a good TV show, and just chilling with my man and dog. I like peace and quiet, and I like to rest. I also like our overly cluttered and messy home. Sure, I still want to travel and cross all the places off of my fantasy list, I want to taste foods and see amazing sites, I want to read books and see movies and awesome bands, but if I don’t it’s okay – I don’t feel so traumatised anymore by the fear of missing out.
Maybe it’s the impending nuptials talking, or the approaching silly season, but even with the shitty stuff that’s happened this year including D being out of work for seven months now, I’m really quite content.
So in regards to a new ‘bucket list’, getting married, celebrating with an awesome wedding, and finally writing a book all make the very short list. Anything else is really the icing on the cake.
Do you have a bucket list?
If so, what’s on it?
Or if you don’t have one, why not?