15 In Living/ Love

Ditching the Bucket List

I used to have one hell of a bucket list. Actually, my bucket list was it baby!

My bucket list was all I had in life. Everything on that list, mostly travel related, I constantly dreamt of doing of one day soon. Living in France for a while immersing myself in the culture, revisiting Italy to explore everything I missed the first time, hitting places such as Vegas and Disneyland, oh, and Japan… The wanderlust those places would inspire. I was so caught up in my fantasies of faraway places that I was never happy at home.

I  pictured myself happily ticking all of those places and more off of my bucket list over a period of years. There were so many things to do, places to see and people to meet. It was just a matter of time and, well, the tiny matter of money. Life would not be complete without having ticked those items off.

I can tell you what wasn’t on the list – settling down, marriage and kids. As an atypical girl, I had no desire to don a wedding dress and walk down the aisle in a ceremony that would bust the bank account, to then be chained to some man for the rest of my life! And kids, well, I don’t think so!

And then I met someone and my whole world changed

I used to have one hell list but these days have decided that ditching the bucket list is a better way to live.

Those items on my bucket list, well, they weren’t so important anymore. Okay, perhaps I’m slightly exaggerating. It probably took about five years for the lure of far-off lands to wear off and for my itchy feet to go away, but as I reflect on the concept of a bucket list ten years later and five weeks off of getting hitched I’m actually pleasantly surprised by the thought that I don’t really have a bucket list anymore. Sure, I’d still love to live in France and visit Japan and see Vegas, but if I don’t go then that’s okay. Life won’t be incomplete, it won’t be the end of the world, I won’t die unhappy and regretful, and everything will be okay.

These days I find myself more satisfied living in the now, experiencing things as they happen and just being. I love sitting on the couch, reading and writing, watching a good TV show, and just chilling with my man and dog. I like peace and quiet, and I like to rest. I also like our overly cluttered and messy home. Sure, I still want to travel and cross all the places off of my fantasy list, I want to taste foods and see amazing sites, I want to read books and see movies and awesome bands, but if I don’t it’s okay – I don’t feel so traumatised anymore by the fear of missing out.

Maybe it’s the impending nuptials talking, or the approaching silly season, but even with the shitty stuff that’s happened this year including D being out of work for seven months now, I’m really quite content.

So in regards to a new ‘bucket list’, getting married, celebrating with an awesome wedding, and finally writing a book all make the very short list. Anything else is really the icing on the cake.

Do you have a bucket list?

If so, what’s on it?

Or if you don’t have one, why not?

 

 

  • Wendy
    December 4, 2015 at 8:02 pm

    Ah, I love your new bucket list — not because of what’s on it, but because of what’s behind it: contentment! Such a hard place to find. I would love to visit all those wonderful places you mention, too; maybe one day we can! In the meantime, cozy nights at home are good. 🙂 Enjoy counting down the days until your wedding, and I’m so excited for you!

    Thanks for hosting Friday Reflections each week, and for the thoughtful writing prompts!

    • Janine Ripper
      December 19, 2015 at 7:31 pm

      You’re most welcome Wendy. Thanks for reading and commenting. Oh and cozy nights, I’m having one of those now!

  • Leanne@crestingthehill
    December 4, 2015 at 8:40 pm

    I don’t really have a bucket list either – I’m pretty content with my life and knowing that things will happen in their own time. I’d still like to travel more and there’s probably a few other things floating in the back of my mind, but no driving urge to do anything at this moment in time. Glad you’ve found contentment too!

    • Janine Ripper
      December 19, 2015 at 7:30 pm

      Isn’t it great 🙂

  • sue
    December 5, 2015 at 9:12 am

    There are things I would still like to do but after losing close friends and family I”m starting to live more in the here and now. Congratulations and best wishes for your upcoming wedding. Enjoying time with family and friends should be on everyone’s bucket list. #FridayReflections

    • Janine Ripper
      December 19, 2015 at 7:29 pm

      It’s crazy how we learn these things through challenging times isn’t it!! And thanks for your support again. Have a wonderful weekend xx

  • Ericka @ A Quiet Girl's Musings...
    December 6, 2015 at 4:38 am

    I’ve always had a bucket list, but that’s just how I roll. My bucket list is really just a guide, a written reminder of things that I long to do, so I don’t waste time and put off doing them. Now, having said that, my bucket list is ever-changing and I fully embrace the things that happen along the way that were never on my bucket list but are amazing just the same.

    • Janine Ripper
      December 10, 2015 at 6:43 pm

      That’s an awesome way to look at a bucket list. Rather than ‘I must do this or regret it’ it’s a living list that morphs and changes as you grow.

  • Mackenzie Glanville
    December 6, 2015 at 4:16 pm

    Thanks first of all for your support this week! Our bucket lists are actually very similar this week, I guess we are both gals living in the moment and being pretty happy with that! Great post!

    • Janine Ripper
      December 10, 2015 at 6:39 pm

      No problem at all. You’ve supported me plenty. I hope hubby has recovered. We def do try to live in the moment. We’ve learnt a lot from our lives xxx

  • Sandy Mangis
    December 7, 2015 at 12:02 pm

    I loved how you called you life’s adventures you bucketlist. I guess we all have had many of those kind of lists, just never had the right word for them. I is always good to have a dream list. It helps our goals and gives us something to work towards. Keep dreaming.

    • Janine Ripper
      December 10, 2015 at 6:42 pm

      And I like how you call them life’s adventures rather than bucket list items!!!

  • Agent Spitback
    December 13, 2015 at 6:27 pm

    That is so true. Your bucket list changes as your life changes. I was the same, wanting to travel lots then married and had kids and travel dropped of. Now that the kids are older, I tell you, the bug is back and my bucket list has travel on it again. So you can come back to your original bucket list! You have a lot of exciting times ahead of you!

    • Janine Ripper
      December 19, 2015 at 7:29 pm

      So very true. You can always come back to it! Thanks for swinging by 🙂

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