Self-care

12 Tips for Staying True to Yourself Online

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In our digital age, staying true to yourself online can be hard. Find out how you can stay true online and learn tips to help you do it effectively.

Staying true to yourself online is a challenge, especially when everyone can appear so put together and ‘perfect’!

I’ve been blogging for over ten years (WOAH!), and I’ve seen a lot.

Over the years, I’ve been part of blogging groups where we have developed genuine friendships based on our mutual love for writing and sharing. I’ve embraced social media as a way to connect, come out of my shell, heal from my depression and make a difference. And over the last three years, I’ve witnessed a major shift into murkiness, nastiness and questionable ethics.

It bothers me.

Over the last few years, I’ve gone from being on a high to losing my confidence and doubting myself, my abilities and what I am doing.

All of the reading, following and – dare I say it – doomscrolling I was doing was getting me down. And at one stage, I was letting all of those ‘inspirational’ people I was following mess with my head.

The flawless health gurus and wellness coaches looked amazing and espoused the benefits of clean eating, wholesome / rawsome food, and healthy ‘lifestyle’ changes. Promising a healthier and happier life, and obtaining the body and life I’ve always dreamt of, what was there not to want?

And then there are the copycats, multi-level marketers, those with ghost-bloggers and who purchased followers, and those who directly rip off your content to make a quick buck.

How could I compete with them?

I was steadfast about sticking to my guns and not doing any of those things, but they all ‘appeared’ to be doing so well!

Social media can be a real head f$%k to the best of us

I’ve had to move away from spending so much time online and on social media even though it has been and still is a major part of my career.

I’ve also pulled back on blogging as I’ve kinda felt like I haven’t had anything to say or that if I do, it won’t cut through the noise as there are so many people sharing online these days who are prettier / smarter / quicker / more energetic / etc. than me.

Honestly, I needed the break for my own sanity.

I needed to claw back my time to focus on health, to do things like reading paperback books and walking the dog whilst not being distracted by the constant buzz of my phone, to take in a concert whilst not taking photos, and to sit binge watching a good show on Netflix.

I needed headspace to think about my future, the past, my goals, and what I wanted in life.

And I needed space to breathe – because breathing is underrated, and I hold my breath a lot!!

Some of the things I’ve done over the last few years to reclaim my life from social media

It’s taken time, however; here are some of the things I’ve done over the last few years to reclaim my life from social media:

  • I removed Facebook from my phone – it’s been over three years now, and I have never looked back (well, I have, but it’s been with a sense of regret about wasting so much time on Facebook!).

  • It’s been over a year since I broke up with Twitter on my phone. Between the constant doomscrolling and obsession with live-tweeting reality shows like The Batchelor, I had to cut myself off cold turkey. I’ve resisted adding it back onto my phone, I still miss it, but I know I am healthier for it.

  • I created a curfew on my phone so that I can’t access key apps between 7 pm and 7 am (unless I turn it off, that is). It has kinda helped me decrease my screen time.

  • I turned off ALL notifications. I tell you, this has been SUCH a sanity saver and has helped with my anxiety.

  • I try to set things up, so I do as much from my laptop as possible, schedule posts in advance, and limit time spent on my phone.

12 Tips for Staying True to Yourself Online

Here are my tips for staying true to yourself online.

Use them as a guide, and it’s okay if you find yourself straying off the path.

We’re all human! Just use these tips to guide you back gently 🙂

  1. Stop comparing yourself to others
  2. Be comfortable with who you are and what you’re doing online
  3. Live according to your values and know your priorities
  4. Treat yourself kindly
  5. Treat others kindly
  6. Establish boundaries
  7. Surround yourself with your kind of people
  8. Believe in whatever it is you are promoting
  9. Remember it is okay to tune out, close your accounts, and go offline for periods
  10. Don’t believe everything you see, hear or read
  11. Go easy on yourself
  12. Stay true to yourself.

The honest truth about social media

“Unless the advertisement-based profit model changes, companies like Facebook will continue to do everything they can to keep your eyes glued to the screen as often as possible. And by using algorithms to leverage our dopamine-driven reward circuitry, they stack the cards—and our brains—against us.”

Trevor haynes

Social media isn’t such a pretty picture when you delve into the world of social media and what lies behind the perfect pictures on Instagram, the popular wellness gurus and the amazing before/after photos.

Most of what you see online is a construct of what people want you to see. Yes. It’s hard to keep reminding yourself of this when your feeds are flooded with beautiful images of people, houses, food, families, and more! But you need to!

Here are some things to be aware of:

  • Buying and selling followers. This is something that I am fervently against, but it happens a lot. My advice is don’t do it, and always question someone with hundreds and thousands of followers, especially when they aren’t following many people.

  • What exactly goes into getting the ‘perfect shot’? Did you know that some travel bloggers travel with a ‘crew’ including someone to do their hair and makeup? For others, there’s the outfits, the food plating, the lighting, the filters and photoshopping. It all sounds bloody exhausting and kinda takes the fun out of the experience, don’t you think?

  • Influencer marketing. Ah, influencers. They are everywhere; some don’t declare product sponsorships and the like, even though they are legally supposed to. Questions to always keep in mind when scrolling are: Are people spruiking something because they believe in what they are recommending? Were they paid or given something for free to talk it up? Are they a multi-level marketer?

And if you need any more convincing, check out this article about how smartphones and social media are turning us all into dopamine addicts.