18 In Anxiety

Releasing Anger

Releasing Anger

At one stage in my life I was so encompassed by anger that I set myself on a path to self-destruction. And then one day I woke up.

To be honest, I can’t actually remember what triggered the wake up call – although I know I’ve had a shit load of them (wake up calls, that is).

I think it was partly related to getting older and wiser, as well as travelling the world, which really helped to open my eyes. It made me see that there was just so much to life, and so many reasons to live for!

Anger is such a terrible feeling. I got angry a few weeks ago, for the first time in ages, and it was horrid. My stomach was all in knots, I felt like my head was going to explode, I couldn’t think straight or control what I was saying – everything I had planned to say went out the window. I felt dizzy and sick to my stomach to be honest.

So I went for a walk. I went for a LONG walk. I walked, and I breathed through it, and an hour later I was a lot more centred, calm, and…I didn’t cry. My stomach was also a lot more relaxed, thank goodness.

I hate being angry. It’s one of my least favourite things, because it effects me physically, and it can make me quite sick. I’m also an anxiety freak, so I tend to mull over things really intensely for what seems like forever.

holding-on-to-anger-is-like-grasping-a-hot-coal-with-the-intent-of-throwing-it-at-someone-else-you-buddha-339291

I see so many people who are becoming increasingly angry and bitter in this world, or who have just given up. It really saddens me, because I really do believe that we can all choose to either let anger and bitterness eat away at us from the inside out, or choose to rise above, let it all go, and become the person we were always meant to be.

We can also choose not to judge others, because, to be honest, one of the biggest root causes of anger is judgment, be it as a result of jealousy, unhappiness, misinterpretation, confusion, stress, history, Facebook envy…

No, releasing anger doesn’t mean that we accept the bad things that have been done…because people do do some really shitty things.

Releasing anger simply means that we are not empowering others by allowing them to effect us negatively. That we are in control of how we feel and how we react.

The next time you feel that little judgmental or angry feeling creeping up inside of you, take a step back (mentally or physically or both!), take a few deep breaths, and analyse why you are feeling that way…is there any other way you can look at the situation? Is there any other way to handle it? Can you see the situation from the other persons perspective?

It doesn’t mean that you necessarily agree with them…it just means that you accept where they are coming from, and that that is enough – because we all have our own filters of the world – whether they be rose-coloured glasses, or some other shade.

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    January 6, 2011 at 10:04 am

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  • Rob Berman
    January 6, 2011 at 11:15 am

    You are brave to share your story to help others. Sounds like you have a very special partner. A tip of the hat to him.

    Rob

    • Janine Ripper
      January 6, 2011 at 2:34 pm

      He’s not bad : ) He doesn’t relaise how good he is.

  • debi
    January 6, 2011 at 12:24 pm

    Beautiful post. 🙂

    • Janine Ripper
      January 6, 2011 at 2:34 pm

      Thankyou.
      I read your post – amazingly honest and touching : )

  • Khadija
    January 6, 2011 at 2:23 pm

    Wow Janine. I would not have ever know you could have hit such a low and hold sooo much in, as knowing you in the last year, you seem so calm and happy. Your very honest to explose a part of your past, but I suppose its your journey and you want readers to understand that holding onto toxic emotions is a very unhealthy way to live. What a great, caring partner you have!

    • Janine Ripper
      January 6, 2011 at 2:36 pm

      Hey : ) Feels like it’s been ages.
      Yes I have been through a lot and have a lot to share. Baby steps. This post was my 1st ‘hurdle’, but it was always my intention to go here, even though there may be stigma and ‘consequences’. I hope the good can outweigh the bad.

  • Carol Hess
    January 7, 2011 at 6:23 am

    A courageous, truthful, strong post that will inspire someone somewhere to let go of anger and self destruction and embrace love.

    The banked fire of smoldering resentment and anger, when alcohol is poured on it, becomes a raging inferno that destroys everyone in its path.

    The writer’s job in society is to tell the truth. You just did it beautifully, Janine.

    • Janine Ripper
      January 7, 2011 at 8:42 am

      Thankyou. Your words and support have really boosted 1) my confidence in my writing, and 2) my direction.
      It means a lot.

  • Khadija
    January 9, 2011 at 7:44 pm

    I was inspired by your honest account of a part of your life. I dont think their is any stigma attached, I think people will see it the way I did, how well written and truthful it is-a reality check for some. tc hun

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  • Muriel
    September 12, 2014 at 10:14 pm

    I started running again to release my anger, as you say. It feels good, and for some weird reason I have a lot more energy as a result…Go figure…

    • Janine Ripper
      September 13, 2014 at 6:49 pm

      Mmmmm running…I can understand that…I really can. I just can’t seem to get the whole running thing down pat. I have such a problem with the breathing!

  • Marie
    September 13, 2014 at 10:09 pm

    Like you, I find walking cathartic. And I want to get some boxing gloves too…

    • Janine Ripper
      September 18, 2014 at 8:46 pm

      Haha yes boxing is definitely cathartic!

  • Letter to Lonely One
    September 21, 2014 at 10:35 am

    […] uses that feeling to bring faithful believers in Christ down to idleness. He uses it to build up bitterness toward people, whom God calls us to love. Satan uses loneliness to take our eyes off of Christ and […]

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