6 In Depression/ Mental Health

What NOT to say to someone with depression

It’s hard dealing with someone who has depression. I won’t deny it.

Depression is hard work for both the people suffering and for those supporting them.

I agree to an extent that those suffering from depression can also be sensitive souls.

I should know – I’m one of them.

What I do know is that even though we can be sensitive, it’s no excuse to insult our integrity, treat us like we are ‘mental‘, and deny the fact that there is anything really wrong with us. There’s also one thing you SHOULD NOT say to someone who has suffered from depression.

‘Depression does not exist.’

2 people very close to me have said this to me within my lifetime. Actually, within the last 5 years.

Surprising hey?

Unless you are one of the ‘depression naysayers‘ (as they do still exist).

I really would have thought that by now there was enough proof that depression existed.  That it was real.  That people don’t just make this shit up.  That those suffering aren’t just moody, sensitive, emotional souls who need to toughen the f%@k up.  Depression exists.  It is real.  I mean, it’s not like I chose 18 years of what was at times hell!

Who would CHOOSE that?!

It still pisses me off to this day.

I’m actually surprised I didn’t bitch slap the people in question at the time, but I was that hurt I think I was stunned into silence.  I’ve moved on though, and those people are still incredibly close to me.  And I totally understand that depression, for those who have not experienced it personally, is hard to understand.  But if you need to understand anything, it’s this:

People with depression need, above everything, support, understanding, patience and tolerance.

With that, they will hopefully make their way through the dark cloud and out the other side into a wonderful HAPPY life.

  • Thom Brown
    February 20, 2013 at 10:01 pm

    I always think of depression as a black hole. It is not the opposite of happiness but rather the absence of all emotion.

  • MuMuGB
    February 20, 2013 at 10:20 pm

    If only depression didn’t exist it would have made my childhood a lot easier…I grew up in the shadow of depression. Not nice.

  • Joy
    February 28, 2013 at 6:24 am

    “It’s all in your head”….another thing worthy of getting bitch slapped for!

  • Sarah
    March 3, 2013 at 10:49 pm

    There is plenty of evidence which proves depression exists, that kind of statement is not only insensitive but suggests ignorance and general lack of education. I usually put it to people like this, you don’t need to understand what it feels like to be depressed that is impossible it would be like knowing what cancer feels like. Your role is simply to accept it and offer support.

  • Jason Watson
    August 16, 2013 at 10:20 am

    I was diagnosed last July after living with the dog for roughly 25 years (he started as a puppy and slowly grew with me). I still have a hard time admitting to myself that I have this issue (my upbringing keeps steering me in the “it’s nothing serious/it’s all in my mind/I should be stronger than this” direction), but I am slowly getting things under control. I’m just really thankful for the love and support of friends and family.

    • Janine Ripper
      August 17, 2013 at 7:29 pm

      Hi Jason, Thanks for sharing. Just realise you are not alone and there are a lot of us out there if you ever need support. I’m glad you have friends and family who are supportive – that is very important. Don’t be too hard on yourself – that’s one word of advise I have. I know I can talk! I’m my own worst critic 🙂

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