Something a lot of people don’t talk about is how recovery from burnout is far from linear.
More often, when you tell someone you are ‘burnout’, you’re met with a quick remark about them being too busy and tired and that ‘I’m burnt out’ or ‘everyone is burnt out these days’ or ‘you’ll snap out of it’.
The reality is that when you’re in real burnout, it’s an all-encompassing heaviness you carry with you as you try to live some semblance of your life… or take time out to rest (if you can) in the hope that you can actually restore your battery.
And then you take a couple of steps forward because you feel ‘rested’, and it’s like you’re twenty steps back again because you overextended yourself a bit.
#Burnout sucks.
And the reality is there is no quick fix.
Or a magic pill.
Recovery takes slowing down.
It takes actual change (not just talking about it).
It takes time.
And it takes a whole lot of self-compassion.
Here are some of the ups and downs of the process and the strategies that have helped me (and still are) with my burnout recovery.
Rest
Rest is crucial when recovering from burnout.
And by rest, I mean resting your body AND your mind. You need to make time to switch off and do absolutely nothing.
Or rather, do things that don;t tax your body and mind as much.
I’ve read 25 books this year (a majority of them fiction) and spent six months hovering over a jigsaw puzzle I finally finished this month. I’ve also spent a lot of time lying on a blanket out in the backyard watching the clouds. Or throwing the ball for the dog and napping.
Schedule space in your schedule for nothing
I have found scheduling in “white space” on my calendar helpful.
White space is a specific time you set aside for self-care, leisure activities, and doing nothing.
For me, this is generally Tuesdays and Thursdays. These days provide me with a good buffer and recovery time around my allotted Monday, Wednesday and Friday work days.
And don’t rely on making time for time out as our busy minds tend to fill our time so easily. Escape the culture of busyness and actually schedule it.
Full disclosure. I work for myself with some amazing clients and have a supportive husband. They provide me with the support and flexibility to be able to do just this.
Establish good boundaries and learn to say no
Establishing boundaries has been key.
Especially prioritising my needs, values and priorities and saying no to things that weren’t aligned with those.
Learning to say no is a challenging but necessary step in anyone’s recovery journey. It can often be one of the hardest parts, as it involves putting up boundaries, speaking up about what you need (and don’t need) and potentially disappointing people to restore and nurture yourself.
But saying no gets easier the more you do it.
Find small moments of joy
Doing small things that bring me joy, like taking a walk in nature with my dog Freya, reading a good book, colouring, or cooking a hearty meal (when I have the energy), helps me to feel more present and connected to the world around me.
Sometimes, it’s something as simple as a cup of tea or sitting in the sun with my eyes closed for 10 minutes.
Cut back
I love to do lots of things, and I’ve always been a hard worker with a busy mind who gets shit done.
However, reality has shown me that I can’t and should not do ‘all the things’. And to be honest, I struggle to do even some of the things some of the time.
Cutting back can open up space for new things … I took an online painting class! Or it can open up space to just be. Which can be an incredibly nice feeling we too often forget about in this chaotic day and age.
Be open and honest
I’ve found it helpful to be open and honest about my burnout with those around me, which has helped me receive the support and understanding I needed to ease up on the pressure I put myself under to perform and do everything.
Still, not everyone will understand, which can be difficult to digest. I feel this comes down to understanding – what burnout is and, again, that whole badge of honour thing. I mean, everyone burns out, right?
The importance of connection and support
As I’ve opened up more and more, I’ve discovered it really is okay to ask for help, accommodations and support from loved ones and colleagues. My husband has been really supportive of me cutting back on work for a bit and understanding my ‘guilt’ for not working so much, cooking dinner or being able to do things I used to do.
On the other hand, dealing with the medical and mental health systems, waitlists, and closed doors has been more than frustrating. I’ve only just started seeing a therapist after being referred 7 months ago. And the thing is, that’s a good wait when compared to waiting lists in places like the UK.
This is why I am so grateful for the support online from people who get it, including an incredible ADHD coach I’ve been working with for five months and an online business mentoring group for Highly Sensirives I’ve been a member of for one and a half years.
Change how you live
As I kicked off the year recovering from burnout and a bad flu, I knew I had to change things, pare things back, and set up stronger boundaries.
And so I developed a recovery plan for myself.
My recovery plan included:
Limiting myself to one social experience a week, if that. This works best on a Friday night or Saturday, so I have the weekend to recover. If something falls on a weeknight or a Sunday, it negatively impacts my energy levels, and it’s a real struggle to push through the week.
I reserved Tuesday and Thursday as non-work days to rest and recoup between work days. I like to have nature walks with my dog at least because even though I’m fatigued, I find that movement and nature are great for my mental health (and that of my doggos). Other than that, I worked on a jigsaw puzzle for a while there, read, watched a lot of Netflix, napped, saw my chiro, or just sat around.
I aimed for one day over the weekend to be spent offline.
And I allotted my client work days to Monday, Wednesday and Friday between 10 am and 3 pm. I’ve extended this as my recovery has progressed, depending on how I feel on the day.
I scheduled chores like washing my hair, changing the bed, cooking and vacuuming to days I knew I’d have some energy in the bank and rest after.
Additionally, I made other changes such as:
- limiting my alcohol intake to two drinks a week,
- cutting back on sugar and refined/processed foods,
- increasing my water intake,
- working from home as much as I could,
- engaging an ADHD coach to learn more about my brain and life with ADHD, and
- other things.
Setbacks
Burnout recovery isn’t always a smooth ride.
Sometimes, my symptoms flare up again. Especially when my schedule gets busier, my senses are overwhelmed, or I’ve pushed myself a little too much because I thought I was ‘better’.
And it would be easy to get frustrated or even angry at that. I know. I’ve been there a few times.
Relapses frustrate me
However, that’s where you need to practice some self-compassion, take the time your mind and body need, and then move forward one baby step at a time.
Remember:
You are doing the best you can at any given time.
And that’s okay.
Recovering from burnout is an individualised and ongoing process.
It requires patience, understanding from others and a willingness to make significant yet gentle changes in your life for the long term.
However, with the right strategies and support, healing and slowly regaining a sense of balance and purpose is possible.
The information and other content provided in this blog post, website or in any linked materials are not intended and should not be considered or used as a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.
