In 2014, I experienced a life-changing year that allowed me to confront my depression, burnout, and changing careers in my 30s.
At the start of the year, I had a wake-up call when I got into a car accident in my driveway. It was my third accident in as many months, making me realise how much chronic anxiety impacted my life. I was sick to my stomach from stress and anxiety. And I always had a cold or the flu.
Plus, I was so incredibly TIRED all of the time.
I knew that something had to change.
After some research, I decided to try an eight-week intensive Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Course (MBSR). Even though I was scared about the commitment, including an hour a day to meditate, I decided to give it a go.
It was a sign that I needed to focus on my health and well-being.
As I started tuning in to my heart, body, and mind during the program, I realised that I had been making myself sick for a long time. Or rather, that the life I was living was making me sick.
And so, I decided to start putting myself first and focus on my health and well-being.
This led to one of the most challenging decisions I have ever made: quitting my career in project management.
As an award-winning project manager at the top of her game, this was a big decision that wasn’t met positively by many of my colleagues.
But after 12 years in project management, I finally realised it was unhealthy for me.
Just because I was good at something did not mean it was good for me.
Around the same time I quit my job, I took the plunge and applied for Awesomeness Fest – which was way out of my introverted comfort zone!
Awesomeness Fest was an annual four-day inspirational fest for entrepreneurs and other alternative peeps looking to connect and be inspired to take the world by storm.
It looked exciting!
With the likes of Vishen Lakhiani and Lisa Nichols, I knew deep down it was what I needed. And when I found out partners could come, I just knew it was what my partner needed.
I bit the bullet, applied, and got an interview.
Even though I was an introvert and people thought I was going to join a cult, I manifested the intention that it would change my life, and in a way, it did.
I faced my old insecurities at Awesomeness Fest and stepped out beyond my comfort zone. It was an amazing experience that allowed me to love more than ever and sacrifice everything in the name of my dreams.
On returning home, I launched my own digital marketing business and haven’t looked back!
Looking back on 2014, I feel raw and vulnerable, but I’m still standing.
In 2014, I found my voice.
And I’m more positive, confident, and stronger than ever.
As Brene Brown says, “feeling this vulnerable means I’m alive.”
2014 was the year I spoke up, pushed myself out of my comfort zone, and loved more than ever.
It was also the year I realised that I am enough just as I am.
If we’re going to find our way back to each other, vulnerability is going to be that path. And I know it’s seductive to stand outside the arena, because I think I did it my whole life, and think to myself, I’m going to go in there and kick some ass when I’m bulletproof and when I’m perfect. And that is seductive. But the truth is that never happens. And even if you got as perfect as you could and as bulletproof as you could possibly muster when you got in there, that’s not what we want to see. We want you to go in. We want to be with you and across from you. And we just want, for ourselves and the people we care about and the people we work with, to dare greatly.
Brene Brown
