People always told me that life in my 30s would be different; I just didn’t believe them.
But lo and behold, as I entered and made my way through my 30s, I discovered it was different – in many positive ways!
In my 30s I finally ‘found’ myself, discovering a confident and somewhat outspoken woman who knew what she wanted, worried less about what others thought and who seized the day more.
Now in my early 40s, I thought it was a good time to pull together some of my thoughts on why I think life in your 30s is amazing!
1. You learn to love yourself
In you’re 30s, you start to love yourself as you are.
Just as a fine wine that grows in-depth and flavour as it ages, so do you – especially in the confidence department. These days I walk taller, do what I want, wear what I want, express my opinion back myself and say NO. It feels AMAZING. Confidence is the bomb. It is sexy. And it is liberating.
Okay, we all have our moments BUT what’s most important is to recognise that we are all beautiful in our many forms, sizes, colours and personalities and that there is no such thing as perfect!
2. You walk to the beat of your own drum
Spend life in your 30s walking to the beat of your own drum. After all, you’re an individual.
You love what you love. You hate what you hate. You’re a mum, a sister, a daughter, a partner, a friend, a colleague… You’re also a dreamer, a closet nerd, a gamer, a writer, an old-school rocker, a crafter, a wino, a cougar, a lover, a traveller, and a cross between everything. Whatever, whoever you are. You march to the beat of your own drum, finally.
3. You own your story
Owning your own story is powerful!
In my 30s I started to own my story, which helped me to heal and grow. In turn, it has now helped me to give back to others.
4. You call bullshit
In your 30s you tend to hone your bullshit detector. These days I can [mostly] sniff bullshit from a mile away and am no longer as naive as I was.
5. You find your voice
Oh wow, do you learn how to speak up for yourself or what in your 30s?
As a young-un I was as shy as a mouse, labelled boring, an introvert, a snob…but in my 30s I finally discovered and started to use my voice. Okay, now I possibly speak too much occasionally, sometimes my opinions aren’t welcome, and sometimes I need to learn to shut up – but after years of suffering in silence, I have so much to say!
6. You toughen up
It’s generally in your 30s when you (finally) develop that tougher skin and drop some of your sensitivities. You also find that what people say and think about you doesn’t affect you as much as it once did, leaving you a lot more time and head space to tackle the most important things in life.
7. It becomes all about the small things in life
When you’re in your 30s you start to appreciate the smaller things in life so much more than you did before.
A glass of red wine, a nice coffee, a square of chocolate, some nice shoes, a hug from a niece, a smile, or a good old guttural belly laugh. And then there’s a great movie and a night on the couch watching your favourite TV series. They all sound so good – especially all together!
8. And contentment
These days I love nothing better than to settle down on the couch on a Friday or Saturday night with a glass of wine and a good movie, then be in bed no later than 11 pm. How times – and people – change!
9. Discovering the pleasure in self-reflection
Your 30s are the perfect time to reflect and enjoy your life journey. I mean, you’ve tackled the struggles and the passage of the younger years, and you are still young enough to enjoy life. Most importantly, you have survived.
10. You realise it’s not too late to make a change
Your 30s are the perfect time to make some well-needed changes, especially those you’ve put off. That new job, the course you wanted to study, ending that relationship, travel. Just do it! After all, a change can be as good as a holiday!
11. You’ve loved, lost and survived
Life in your 30s isn’t complete without either love or loss, but they are what make us who we are. They make us stronger, wiser, and more fragile, yet more appreciative of what we have, including our own life and the lives of others.
As my 30s progressed, things that had freaked me out no longer bothered me or scared me as much. I had loved, I had laughed, I had lost. I had lived and learned. And I had survived. I also had my future to look forward to.
12. You’re taken more seriously
I looked young in my 20s – a blessing in my 30s – so I found it hard to get people to take me seriously as a Project Manager in a male-dominated environment. This made me doubt myself, so I often felt like a fraud.
In my 30s, I still look younger than I am, but I’m being taken more seriously, and people are actually starting to listen to me. Perhaps that’s the confidence and self-belief talking?
13. You don’t stop learning
Using all you have learned in life so far, makes you a better, stronger, more resilient person.
14. You get rid of excess baggage
Baggage. We all collect it. Heartbreak, shitty jobs, broken promises, abandoned dreams. Some of us have a ton of it, but by the time you hit your 30s, you should start throwing out that excess baggage. I highly recommend it – you’ll feel so much lighter for it!
15. You start to look after yourself
We all know smoking is bad, drinking booze in moderation is good, eating fast food is not healthy, moderate exercise is healthy, and stress can kill us. It’s our personal decision whether we listen to our bodies, our minds, and the doctor. It comes down to choice. You either look after yourself, or you don’t. Enough said.
16. You learn to say no
As a chronic people-pleaser, it took me until my 30s to start saying no to people. It took me a lot longer to start saying no without stressing about it for days beforehand and ending up an anxious mess. It took me even longer to be able to say no to their faces…
Learning to say no is one of the best things you can ever do.
17. You know you’re not perfect, and that’s okay
Because no one’s perfect, that’s why! By now you know that. You know you aren’t, your parents aren’t, your friends and partners aren’t, and you know your bosses certainly aren’t. We are all beautifully imperfect.
18. You realise what is most important
You know what works for you and what doesn’t. The key is not to follow the masses and to choose the life hacks that work for you, even if they aren’t ‘en-trend’. And if they are en-trend, don’t just do them because everyone else is. You know you’re not a lemming. You know what to do.
In your 30s you realise that what was important in your teens and twenties is pretty insignificant, which is a huge reality check.
Those things that used to feel like the end of the world; that guy who didn’t return your text, the messy house, having way too much on your to-do list, not having good enough clothes, shoes or handbags, not landing that job you had your heart set on…well, you look back and laugh at how silly it was to make a mountain out of those mole hills!
19. You find happiness where you least expect it
I tell you, the moment I stopped chasing happiness, that was when everything changed. It was when I started allowing myself to BE happy. It was also when I started to tune in more to the little things and the moments that happiness washed over me. Yes, there were times when I was sad, angry, and unhappy. But that’s life, and building more awareness around the happy moments helped to make the lows less low.
20. You learn to let shit go
Sometimes you have to let shit go because it’s not worth it in the long run, even if you thought it was important. And as you progress through your 30s, this becomes much easier.
21. You grow
As your 30s progress, you grow and continue to do so. And every day is another blessing. An opportunity to live, laugh and love.
So embrace all that life has to give; as you continue to do so, you will continue to live an amazing life.
22. Opportunities abound
It is true what they say. Once you open yourself up to opportunities, things do come your way. You can’t just rest on your laurels, though – you HAVE to put yourself out there, talk to people, share ideas, ask for help, network, and work hard. You also have to know what opportunities to pass up. That’s tricky, as not all opportunities are good for you.
23. Discovering womanhood
It wasn’t until my mid-30s that I started feeling like a woman (rather than a girl). I now embrace my femininity, wear dresses, play around with hairstyles, and rock a pair of heels (when I’m not falling over and twisting my ankle that is…). It’s a weird but wonderful feeling, helped along by developing a thing called confidence.
24. You live life courageously
Life takes courage.
Courage to push through the hard times, the failures, the hiccups. Courage to push forward when we succeed and not run in the other direction. Courage to change or to stay as we are when others want us to change.
We all have it, it just takes a while to find it. I found mine in my 30s and am so glad I did!
25. You realise that multitasking is overrated
Focusing on one thing at a time is much more productive than multitasking…and that comes from the reformed Queen of Multitasking. Eventually, multitasking leads to mistakes and burnout (been there, done that).
These days I prefer to be more mindful and to focus on one thing at a time. Yes, I’m slower, but by doing I think things through more, can focus, and the quality of what I do is much better.
26. You find your style
In you’re 30s, you come into your own sense of style. Be it fashionable or comfortable, it’s all about what makes you feel good in your skin – and stuff what anyone else thinks!
It wasn’t until I hit my 30s that I found what worked for me. These days I buy clothes that don’t need ironing, flatter my shape, and feel good. I opt for boots, wedges and thongs over stilettos. I’m also a lot more playful and experimental, with a dash of 1950s glamour here, some funky dresses there, differing hairstyles and colours – I’m enjoying mixing things up!
27. You find your tribe
Every successful person has their support team, aka tribe and as you progress through your 30s, you start to build your trusted network of go-to people. Be it your hairdresser, beautician, mentor, accountant, cleaner, councillor, or networking group, they help and support you to get to where you want to be, and to be a success.
28. True friendships blossom
In your 30s, you accept that friends come and go, that you will make many acquaintances through life, but that true friendship will last a lifetime even if you don’t see each other for a year or three.
I love seeing my good friends because even though we may not have seen each other for a year, every time we meet up it’s like we saw each other yesterday.
29. You embrace authenticity
Authenticity is about being ‘true’ to ourselves. It’s paying our self some respect. It’s living, doing business and being with people aligned to our values system.
In your 30s, you finally start living by these ‘guidelines’ and creating the life you love!
30. You’re not so afraid
I’ve spent a lot of my life afraid of things. Be it things out of my control, of people (social anxiety), what may or may not happen, or nothing (that’s the anxiety). The beautiful thing about growing older is living a life less afraid. Sure, I still have anxiety, but these days I’m less afraid of the unknown and more willing to try things!
Did you love this post? Then you might like these too!
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